I think Americans particularly dislike this obsequious type of service. People from other countries love it. Steve Jobs famously had very little household help and their family did their own household chores for a very simple reason that he couldn’t buy his way out of — he didn’t like strangers in his fucking house all the time. The best writing on this is of course David Foster Wallace for Harper’s.
Agatha Christie: “As a child I never dreamed that I would be so poor that I could not afford a servant, not so rich as to own a motor car.”
This varies widely around the world. I lived with an international student who was definitely from an upper middle class family but not a billionaire by any means; the family had several household staff, and that was just a normal luxury in the way that an American family might have a dishwasher.
I can’t speak for all Americans, but in New England most people would rather spend $5000 on a dishwasher than $4000 on lifetime dishwashing services from a person. I don’t want someone in my house and putting away dishes isn’t so agonizing that I need to avoid it.
I also wouldn’t want to live with my extended family in the same house. I’m guessing that past a point, home is more of an active communal space than a private retreat, so what’s a few more people?
We’re completely creeped out by the toilet assistants that no one bats an eye at.... And you’re the country where some states won’t let you pump your own gas
Steve jobs and David foster Wallace is seen as outsiders, to claim they represent the attitude of Americans is absurd
It is. Tipping culture incentivizes American service to get you out the door and free up your table for the next group. The wait staff are also constantly coming by the table to refill things or ask you to spend more money on more drinks and food. If you don’t, the check is next. This behavior is seen as perfectly normal in the states, but I’d consider it much inferior to the German environment where you get to enjoy your food and your company and if you ever need anything, just motion the waiter over.
In the USA, in restaurants, the wait staff get most of their income from tips. Because of this, they are ridiculously obsequious. Female wait staff tolerate a grotesque amount of sexual harassment, because if they complain then they lose their income. Compare that to the wait staff in Europe, which does not expect tips and who do not depend on tips for their income.