I feel like I have this setup. For the last 3 years, I’ve been going to a cafe in downtown SF. Over the course of this time, I’ve met people who’ve become best friends, roommates, ppl to do side projects with and much more. Friends know if they want to talk to me they can very reliably just walk in and find me there 8/10 times.
The cool thing about this set up is that you make new friends on a rolling basis which is key because friends you hang with will occasionally move elsewhere or change lifestyles. Over the course of the 3 years, I think the following implicit principles have worked really well:
- We have no expectations of finding each other.
- We don’t make plans.
- On the rare occasion that we make plans, it is very informal. You’re free to flake / be late without being nagged or feeling like you’ve someone waiting on you (they aren’t.)
- Very concrete plans are reserved for events (sad and happy) like a breakup or career chat — in those cases, I’ll make sure to be there at the time I expect the friend.
The cool thing about this set up is that you make new friends on a rolling basis which is key because friends you hang with will occasionally move elsewhere or change lifestyles. Over the course of the 3 years, I think the following implicit principles have worked really well:
- We have no expectations of finding each other.
- We don’t make plans.
- On the rare occasion that we make plans, it is very informal. You’re free to flake / be late without being nagged or feeling like you’ve someone waiting on you (they aren’t.)
- Very concrete plans are reserved for events (sad and happy) like a breakup or career chat — in those cases, I’ll make sure to be there at the time I expect the friend.