As someone who often held the job title of "design systems specialist" (usually mobile) many times, one thing that always helped was:
This is what standard iOS vs. Android elements look like out of the box, this is how navigations works out of the box, this is how some ux patterns (like various pickers) work out of the box. Now this is easy to change, this is more difficult to change, and this is something you should never change.
There you go, we have a good spine for a design system (and not just a component library), and we have a good starting point to fix the relationship between designers and developers, which is broken way too often, and hinders progress way too much.
It does require serious time spent in XCode and Android Studio actually writing at least hobby projects, but that knowledge pays off tremendously in building trust between teams.
I've found that Android development is actually fairly easy due to the way the system handles the different display tags and how standardized they are. For web it seems like there are multiple layers of possible options - html, css, whatever framework, then the libraries and content management systems. I'm sure this exists to some extent in Android projects, but it doesn't seem to be as much spaghetti.
This is what standard iOS vs. Android elements look like out of the box, this is how navigations works out of the box, this is how some ux patterns (like various pickers) work out of the box. Now this is easy to change, this is more difficult to change, and this is something you should never change.
There you go, we have a good spine for a design system (and not just a component library), and we have a good starting point to fix the relationship between designers and developers, which is broken way too often, and hinders progress way too much.
It does require serious time spent in XCode and Android Studio actually writing at least hobby projects, but that knowledge pays off tremendously in building trust between teams.