I think the popularity of ragging on having kids is because it's finally able to be done in polite conversation without being seen as a monster. Some of us don't want kids, but find that we become second-class citizens when the topic comes up. Last night we had a barbeque with parents of a one-year- and two-year old in attendance. All night the conversation fluttered around nappies and toddler-proofing houses and more stuff about dealing with baby poo and vomit and whatnot.
On the one hand, it's fine, because these are new sets of parents using a pressure release valve, but on the other hand, it's screamingly boring because I've had to deal with the exact same conversation with new parents throughout my life. Try and change the topic and it comes back to baby vomit on the car seats or how the cat doesn't deal well with fistfuls of fur pulled out of her. It's not socially acceptable to indicate that it's boring to be in this conversation yet again - because to these parents, these kids are special. Which is fine, for them, but for me, the only thing that ever changes are the names.
I guess this is a long-winded way of saying that the ragging on having kids is also an escape valve; that it's a way of highlighting that not having kids is also a valid life choice rather than just bearing it silently. We'll never get to a point where it's perfectly acceptable to say 'No, I don't want kids' without speaking up from time to time.
On the one hand, it's fine, because these are new sets of parents using a pressure release valve
Actually, that's not why we do it. It's because in that time of our life it's all we really know that we can talk about to the general population.
If you have specific common interests, then there's that too. But we don't know the stats on the sports teams any more, at least not reliably. We used to be deep into the details of politics or current events, but now we're a little fuzzy on the fifth-paragraph stuff. And some subjects we just let go entirely.
We know what we work at and taking care of the kids.
There are exceptions, of course. There is that guy that still seems to be able to do everything he did before having kids. But you can spot his wife at that same party, and you don't need to be introduced in order to do so. She's surrounded by girlfriends at the party, she looks a bit unhappy around the eyes, and she holds your gaze for a moment too long.
On the one hand, it's fine, because these are new sets of parents using a pressure release valve, but on the other hand, it's screamingly boring because I've had to deal with the exact same conversation with new parents throughout my life. Try and change the topic and it comes back to baby vomit on the car seats or how the cat doesn't deal well with fistfuls of fur pulled out of her. It's not socially acceptable to indicate that it's boring to be in this conversation yet again - because to these parents, these kids are special. Which is fine, for them, but for me, the only thing that ever changes are the names.
I guess this is a long-winded way of saying that the ragging on having kids is also an escape valve; that it's a way of highlighting that not having kids is also a valid life choice rather than just bearing it silently. We'll never get to a point where it's perfectly acceptable to say 'No, I don't want kids' without speaking up from time to time.