The conclusion, "People have a right to expect more from you" seems dead wrong to me, and I don't really see any answer to the question asked by the title.
If you are want some better answers, read instead this little gem ESR posted on Google+ a little while ago:
Let's say that the person you love the most has just been shot. He or she is lying in the street, bleeding and screaming.
A guy rushes up and says, "Step aside." He looks over your loved one's bullet wound and pulls out a pocket knife -- he's going to operate right there in the street.
You ask, "Are you a doctor?"
The guy says, "No."
You say, "But you know what you're doing, right? You're an old Army medic, or ..."
At this point the guy becomes annoyed. He tells you that he is a nice guy, he is honest, he is always on time. He tells you that he is a great son to his mother and has a rich life full of fulfilling hobbies, and he boasts that he never uses foul language.
Confused, you say, "How does any of that fucking matter when my (wife/husband/best friend/parent) is lying here bleeding! I need somebody who knows how to operate on bullet wounds! Can you do that or not?!?"
Now the man becomes agitated -- why are you being shallow and selfish? Do you not care about any of his other good qualities? Didn't you just hear him say that he always remembers his girlfriend's birthday? In light of all of the good things he does, does it really matter if he knows how to perform surgery?
In that panicked moment, you will take your bloody hands and shake him by the shoulders, screaming, "Yes, I'm saying that none of that other shit matters, because in this specific situation, I just need somebody who can stop the bleeding, you crazy fucking asshole."
EDIT: I tried submitting it, but it's marked as "dead". I guess the website got on HN bad side. Too bad, it'd have made a great discussion.
"We are surrounded by an ideology of exceptionalism that
teaches us that we will find fulfillment through great personal
achievement. But this is a terrible way to build identity. Not because
it is crassly inhumane--though it is--but because it is false."
I wouldn't go so far as to say "nobody." There can be a small number of people that genuinely care about you. Most people won't. But that's what makes that small number of people special.
If you are want some better answers, read instead this little gem ESR posted on Google+ a little while ago:
http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-yo...
Let's say that the person you love the most has just been shot. He or she is lying in the street, bleeding and screaming.
A guy rushes up and says, "Step aside." He looks over your loved one's bullet wound and pulls out a pocket knife -- he's going to operate right there in the street.
You ask, "Are you a doctor?"
The guy says, "No."
You say, "But you know what you're doing, right? You're an old Army medic, or ..."
At this point the guy becomes annoyed. He tells you that he is a nice guy, he is honest, he is always on time. He tells you that he is a great son to his mother and has a rich life full of fulfilling hobbies, and he boasts that he never uses foul language.
Confused, you say, "How does any of that fucking matter when my (wife/husband/best friend/parent) is lying here bleeding! I need somebody who knows how to operate on bullet wounds! Can you do that or not?!?"
Now the man becomes agitated -- why are you being shallow and selfish? Do you not care about any of his other good qualities? Didn't you just hear him say that he always remembers his girlfriend's birthday? In light of all of the good things he does, does it really matter if he knows how to perform surgery?
In that panicked moment, you will take your bloody hands and shake him by the shoulders, screaming, "Yes, I'm saying that none of that other shit matters, because in this specific situation, I just need somebody who can stop the bleeding, you crazy fucking asshole."
EDIT: I tried submitting it, but it's marked as "dead". I guess the website got on HN bad side. Too bad, it'd have made a great discussion.