No, I understand that this is the point they're making, but the point I'm making is that it's not about me. Due to the circumstances of this arrangement, where we only meet in public places, there would've been no way to fire her face-to-face and allow her to retain her dignity. This is why I ultimately decided not to do it in person. Should I have fired her face-to-face just so I could be extra punished for having to fire someone, when it would create a lasting embarrassment and loss of dignity for the employee? I guess a lot of people here think so, and value the punishment of their employer over their own privacy.
As a side note, I don't believe I need to be punished for firing this employee. This didn't enter into my calculation because I don't consider it a punishment to fire someone face-to-face if that's appropriate for the situation.
It's not about punishment. It's not: oh, you did something bad, you need to be punished for it. It's that it shouldn't be easy, and doing it in person makes sure of that. That's all it is. And it sounds a lot like you're rationalizing your desire to avoid that situation by telling yourself that it would be better for the employee, as though you won't let yourself consider the idea that it's all about it being easier for you.
As a side note, I don't believe I need to be punished for firing this employee. This didn't enter into my calculation because I don't consider it a punishment to fire someone face-to-face if that's appropriate for the situation.