Awesome, and outstanding work! Very, very funny. I'd love to see what their team of writers could do with this, because it seems very close and would only get better.
Feedback: the only parts that seemed a little stilted and flat were around the licenses, but the payoff at the end made up for the setup. I'm having a hard time describing what I mean. About 85% of SV's humor comes from punching up at the egos, the money, the hubris, the skewed reality of a self-referential cloistered environment. About 15% is more gentle, knowing jabs at the characteristics that Richard and the engineers embody (social awkwardness, lack of skills necessary to survive in this environment, the monomaniacal pursuit of the right way of doing things).
The early license jokes seem to be more punching down--I picture all those licenses are earnest one-offs written by devs in their garages, and it's punching at their earnestness. When SV takes shots at individuals making IP, it's almost always because the founders are incompetent opportunists with bad ideas. Licenses can be bad, but it's better if they're institutionally bad.
It might benefit if the licenses are even more over the top, or are tied to entities or situations that are more mockable from a punch up standpoint. Like cynical open source licenses around software for mundane consumer hardware like refrigerators or blenders or a Furby which could create civil suit exposure for use cases people would normally do. Perhaps a bartender mixing a Raviga actually violates a Vitamix open source license. At his office, they tell the lawyer what they're trying to do--he cites a similar license he wrote for a Kickstarted pocket blender startup--Jian Yang tackled at the end when he brings the Ravigas back (by the kickstarter'd founder who was invited to the birthday party).
Loved every minute of it. The flow and humour seem spot of if you ask me. It's been a real enjoyable read while we wait for S3. The only thing I felt that was a little out of place was the reference to Google and middle management (p17), but I wondered if that should have been Hooli.
I love how in the interview on TC you say (in reference to AOL):
>> BR: I’m honestly amazed they’re still around.
You did realise that TC is owned by AOL when you said that right? No wonder the interview seemed to pass over that comment :)
I actually completely forgot that TC is owned by AOL during that interview, and you're the first person to bring it to my attention. Thanks for the laugh.
Wow I honestly expected this to be cringe-worthy, but that was hilarious. I thing I would say is that every character is almost a caricature of themselves (Richard is meek, Erlich is an egotistical idiot, Dinesh and Gilfoyle are snarky nerds, etc), but I guess thats inevitable after the first couple seasons.
I've been waiting for a show to embrace the crowd sourcing of writing. I imagine a reddit thread with hundreds of ideas/plot lines/debate drawn out for an official writer to "pull" into the show.
Oh, I misread your comment, I think. You're talking about the showrunners themselves incorporating ideas from the community, right?
That would be great, although unfortunately Hollywood is so concerned about lawsuits that show staffs aren't even allowed to read scripts for their own shows. For example, the Silicon Valley staff isn't allowed to read this script; if I wanted to apply for a job there, I'd have to write a script for a different show and send that in.
Yea, are there any examples of a show like SV crowd sourcing content for it? I know that MythBusters has crowd sourced episode ideas: https://www.reddit.com/r/mythbusters/comments/3cfn7r/suggest... Top comment from Adam Savage: "You guys are submitting great ideas. We should have done this a long time ago! Keep your ideas of things to blow up coming too!" But I don't know of any shows with a narrative doing this?
Would love to see SV do the same for 1 episode (they could get really meta with it)
Sad to hear there are legal barriers preventing this. I imagine that a simple "sign this release before submitting your work" still leaves room for lawsuits?
It's a great idea. To be fair, there's plenty of this happening already for most shows (check their subreddits, etc). I think what's a little different here is actually writing it out as a script.
I'm intrigued by the idea of writing a full season of Silicon Valley, but I'd also like the challenge of writing for different kinds of shows. I may write a Rick and Morty script next to see what that's like.
The honest answer is that I have no idea. My process here was, I was on vacation in Big Sur and started jotting down things I thought would be funny for a Silicon Valley episode. When I got home, I downloaded a trial version of Scrivener and took about two days dumping those ideas into a script. Originally the two subplots were entirely separate, and then I went on a walk and thought of a way to combine them at the end. The script happened to come to 31 pages, which is about right for a 22-minute sitcom, so I just called it a day. It was not a very deliberative process in terms of how much material to include in one episode.
Only part I felt was inconsistent was his treatment of Lauren. She seems a hyper-rational, albeit overly-prudent character, and doesn't strike me as wanting to be involved with the whole boys club nonsense.
I think there's plenty of support for Erlich caring about Richard. For example, when he spots Richard crying and then immediately goes and beats up the kids who scammed him out of Adderall :)
I'm really confused... when they say Captain Crunch are they talking about the cereal character or the "hacker" John Draper? Based on the content it could, ironically, be either
While I'm a fan of exposing the absurdity of SV, I also think we have reached the point where any such attempt will, similar to war and business movies, also have the opposite effect.
Writing unsolicited spec scripts is a standard way to break into television writing. It's a pretty low rung on the ladder because it doesn't take much creativity. The tone and the characters are already established; you're actually doing it wrong if you have them speak or behave in a manner other than what the audience is used to. It sounds like it would be fun but if you want to get hired you have to suppress the urge to be clever.
Actually, it is quite a grey area. Fanfic/spec scripts could be considered derivative works and therefore infringe on the copyright on the original work, but there are provisions for fair use and parody.
And poorly understood! George Martin of Game of Thrones writes that he's against fanfic. Because if he allows it, he can lose his copyright. Then he goes on about Tarzan, and how since people made unauthorized movies on the theme, the author of Tarzan dies poor.
Plus the standard "I made them no one else can touch", which is a valid personal feeling, but little basis for law.
In practice, companies do not tend to go after these people since there is the risk of an uproar and it does no harm to the company typically. In addition, the risk of an expensive lawsuit is usually not worthwhile on the companies' end, especially given the pros/cons
Writing a spec script is legally permissible, and is not a violation of copyright.
Distributing a spec script gets into fair use issues--submitting it to the show producers, or using it a sample to get a screenwriting gig are generally acceptable. Distributing it online generally crosses the boundary into non-permissible uses. (Meaning that it is an actionable copyright violation which the copyright owners could choose to pursue and would likely prevail in court.)
